New Blog

I'm jumping back into blogging, but needed it to be different. So come join me over at:

Extrodinarily Ordinary

It's time again for brand new crayons and fresh packs of paper. New notebooks, sharpened pencils... I'm in planning mode again for the new school year. Our official start day, Lord willing, will be August 24th. I usually have high expectations and grand plans of what we'll accomplish, we'll see how far we get. 

My motto for our year (that I plan to print out and stick on the wall) is:

"The only way to keep chaff out 

of a child's cup is to 

fill it brimful with 

good wheat." 

~Charles Spurgeon

We've had a lot of chaff sneak in, and I'm longing for an abundance of good wheat!

Where I belong

Last year I chose a phrase to try and live out as a sort of goal or mantra for myself. Choose joy. After Josiah died I found that it was much easier to keep myself super busy. Occupy my time fully, downtime was the enemy so to speak. For the most part, it worked. on the one hand being busy constantly though does not allow much time for sadness to drift in. On the other hand it didn't allow for much joy either. I found myself going through the days in a pretty contented manner, but inside something lacked.

I hadn't noticed just how far my heart had drifted.

At the beginning of March we closed our resale shop and the kids and I are home full time again. During one of the first weeks I posted a picture to Facebook of my kids surrounding the dining room table doing their schoolwork. I sat at the end of the table with tears in my eyes.....feeling complete joy. Joy that I hadn't felt in a long, long time.

I think that having the store and being so busy was a good thing for me for the time. ...now though,...

Being home is good. Really good.

Maggie

 

September 23rd, 2014

 

Magdalena Rahab was born

 

weighing in at 7 lbs 13 ounces

 

 

Countdown to baby

It's starting to sink in that I'm due to have this baby in 6 1/2 weeks!~

I'm feeling the need to start preparing (I know you're thinking I should have thought of this sooner, right?) We already have most of the necessity things like a bed, car seat, Ergo, blankets, clothes and such so my list of 'needs' are more centered around what items we'll need as a family. Things we use everyday that I can stock up on so we won't be running to the store. 

This is what my list looks like (in addition to diapers & wipes): 

• Paper towels
• toilet paper
• paper plates
• plastic utensils
• garbage bags
• shampoo/conditioner
• toothpaste
• laundry detergent & dryer sheets
• dish soap

And also some pantry items that will make life a bit easier like: 

• bottled water (our well water isn't that yummy)
• powdered Gatorade (for the hubs)
• extra jars of peanut butter & jelly
• Coffee k-cups
• granola bars
• fruit snacks

I decided when making out my menu plan this week that I'm going to try and streamline our breakfast & lunch options as well. I narrowed it down so the kids will have just a couple of options. 

Breakfast: Pick one~

Instant oatmeal (2 pkt limit each) 

or 

a ziploc with 1 cup dry cereal & a granola bar

Lunch:  ~Mom picks which and adds a fruit & veggie, will be same for all kids each day~

Hot dog

Cup o noodle

Beef & Cheese burrito

Quesadilla

PB&J 

I know those are not at all the healthiest choices, but I'm going for easy and cheap.

I'll also be doubling as many dinner recipes as possible to put the extra one in the freezer. Making ahead muffins, burritos (breakfast & lunch varieties) AND try to get caught up on the laundry...ha! That won't happen, but I can dream! 

Not your typical get ready for baby type stuff now is it? :) 

School year 2014-2015 - The plan

Yesterday I sat down and worked out a plan for the upcoming/fast approaching school year. My plans are always more of a goal, as in, it's a rough draft that gets tweaked as we go along. :)

Here goes:

Amanda - 9th grade (I have a high schooler!!!)

Notgrass World History which covers three subjects: Bible, Lit & History

Ctc Math Algebra 1 (https://ctcmath.com/purchase/homeschool/) - this is something new we're trying this year for most of the kids...give me a few weeks and I'll come back with a review for you!

Apologia Physical Science

I've heard that Notgrass is heavy on reading, but my girl loves to read so we may add in some other independent reading with book review papers as well.

Kenny - Grade 8

Ctc math Algebra 1

Language arts - Saxon writing / grammar 8
                         CLP building spelling skills
                        Independent Reading list (read book, write review/response paper) 2 books per month

Apologia Anatomy - we've tried to complete this one twice now and it just never got done. So THIS is the year we WILL do it. :) He will be working with Stephen, Jessica & Abram as a group for this and history.

Mystery of history - as group

Code academy - computer programming

Bible - CLP studying God's word

Stephen - Grade 6

Ctc math - 7th to pre algebra

Language arts - Saxon grammar / writing 7
                         Explode the code 8
                         CLP building spelling skills
                         Wordly wise 6
                         Independent reading - 1 book per month with review/response paper

History & Science - as group

Code academy - computer programming

Bible - CLP studying God's word

Jessica - Grade 5

Ctc Math - she just finished up Saxon 6/5 so I'm assuming she'll start at level 6

Language arts - Wordly wise
                         CLP building spelling skills
                         Climbing to good English grade 5
                         Independent reading - 2 books per month (of mom's choice)
History & Science- as group

Elementary Spanish class (hosted here at our store)

Bible - CLP studying God's word

Abram - Grade 3

Ctc math

History & Science- as group

Language Arts - Climbing to good English grade 3
                          Wordly wise 2 & 3
                          Pathway & Abeka readers to read aloud to mom
                          Handwriting/ copy work out of above readers

Bible - CLP studying God's word

Elementary Spanish class (hosted here at our store)

Noah & Kathleen - K-1st grade (I'm teaching these two together, hoping that works well!)

CTC math or Singapore 1A & 1B - I'd like to use the online math but I'm not sure if I'll love it. They need the handwriting more hands on at this age so we'll see.

Language arts will be a combination of : Alpha phonics, Explode the Code, Evan Moor's Phonics Fundamentals & handwriting/copy work.

All together

On the drive to and from our store (approx 15-20 mins.)
we'll listen to audio: 2 days/week for history
                              2  days/week for Science
                              1 day - literature audio book          

Memorize 1 verse of scripture per week & keep a file box of all of them for review

We'll add in a bunch of other random things that I think are 'school' but won't count to actually write down in the plan. Educational games, documentaries, life skills (cooking, chores, safety skills, etc), workouts at the gym, swimming, entrepreneurial skills from working at our store and much more. :)                      

Camping

3 1/2 days

3 nights

15 people

Fishing, swimming, boating....

lots of eating

S'mores around the fire.

Mosquito bites & sunburns

Can't wait to do it all again.

33

Today I am 33 years old. 

Age is a funny thing, like time... One moment it can seem like it's happening way too slowly and the next moment it can seem like it's rushing by.

I was walking around the hardware store last night and caught a glimpse of my oldest boy just beside me. It made me pause for a second and just think....how am I old enough to have a son who looks me eye to eye & will be taller than me any day (if he's not a hair taller already)?? How am I old enough to be nearing the birth of our twelfth child?

A friend commented something the other day on this photo:  I love the symbolism, with the swing showing what the Sims family represents in enjoying every minute of life.

and it really made me think. 

I want that statement to be accurate. I want to enjoy every minute of life. 

"Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment" (1 Timothy 6:17 NIV).

Catch up

When Google reader ceased to exist I pretty much ditched blogging. Most friends were on Facebook and that coupled with a busy life just kind of took over. But I miss blogs. I miss people sharing what's happening in their lives beyond a one sentence status.

To jump back in I'm going to just start with a glimpse of today.

Today is Saturday, I'm at our store until 3:00 today and it's a pretty mellow day. The street is closed off for a cycling race this afternoon, so traffic is slower than normal. It's giving me a chance to get some backlog of books & clothes tagged. I'm here with 8 of the kids, Ian's not feeling too well and stayed home with Kenny & Stephen.

Nicholas is almost 16 months now & not quite walking yet, though I keep catching him standing on his own and he's sure cruising along furniture fast! His hair has started filling in and it's CURLY! The first of our kids to get that trait from their daddy.

I'm 24 weeks preggo now with our 12th baby! Still seems crazy when I say that. :) I'm feeling well, second trimester is usually the 'easy' part. No nausea & tiredness and not quite big enough to be uncomfortable yet.

In the past month we got to visit with three of my aunts, my uncle & two cousins all of whom we hadn't seen since we moved to Illinois almost 6 years ago. They got to meet several of our kiddos who have been born since...it was a lot of fun!

Now I'm off to eat my lunch and get a few more things done before closing up shop and heading home for the evening.

Today marks two years.

Last night I was trying to find something in my room and ended up looking through old photos of the family. This is something I love to do, look at photos. Little moments of time captured for us to remember. Marveling at how much my kids look alike (SO many of Amanda that look just like Mabel does now!). In the back of my mind though I kept thinking about how the photos we have of Josiah are finite. There will never be more, no new ones to add. I was feeling pretty blue about it. I just prayed that the Lord would give me strength, since obviously on my own this just plain stinks. 

And you know what? The Lord cares. He loves us SO much! 

So much so that that prayer that I sent up in the midst of my little pity party, He chose to answer.

 First thing I see this morning was a message from my sweet friend Michelle. She (unbeknownst to her) sent me a picture that I'd never seen before, that very hour I prayed. How amazing is that!?!?

I'll tell you.

It's pretty stinking amazing.

But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy. Spread your protection over them, that those who love your name may rejoice in you.

Psalm 5:11

Buddies

Today a customer brought in a play kitchen with a boat load of accessories, food & dishes. My Toddlers are having a ball being the official toy 'testers'.

How others see us

 

   A couple of months ago I watched this video and it really resonated with me, as it probably did with millions of others. We beat ourselves up so much, and not just over appearance either. 

Did I say the right thing?, act the right way......did they think I'm odd or crazy? 

    To see first hand how others viewed them is eye opening! Don't you wish you could see yourself that way? Not so much as to make you vain, but to give yourself a little more grace. We are made in the image of God, we are His beautiful creation!    

     Have you had people compliment you, yet you shrugged it off thinking 'they can't really mean that' or 'they're just saying that to be nice'? Do you stand in your closet getting ready for an outing (or anywhere for that matter) and put on one outfit only to change because you think it makes you look fat, or frumpy....or ______ fill in the blank? Do you leave a party and wonder just how many times you put your foot in your mouth? I know I sure do!

   I received a very sweet encouraging email the other day and it made me look back in time. Back to a few comments people have made over the years that made me stop in my 'beat myself up attitude', making me long to get a glimpse of myself from their point of view. 

   It makes me want to be more intentional about telling people how I see them. How they inspire me. Not by just saying 'you inspire me' but including details. Writing a note, email or text. 

I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. ~Maya Angelou

So, I'm challenging myself (and you!) to tell people more often how you see them (the good stuff) and what they mean to you. Allow them to feel Christ's love through you.

How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! 

And that is what we are! 1 John 3:1 

'

Contentment

We are a year & a half into running our own business. It's a lot of work & stress and I have to keep reminding myself of the things that make me happy about it instead of looking to the future at where I want to be.

• Witnessing two ladies picking out & buying SIX bags full of clothes to go to a family in need.

• Watching someone pay for a set of cloth diapers to send home with a missionary who would not have access to disposable diapers.

• Providing a place for families to be able to purchase homeschool materials that I know they wouldn't be able to afford new. 

• Having many people comment on how much they love hearing the Christian music playing in our shop.

• Being able to ask my boys to help a customer carry a box of books and see them not skip a beat, but jump up to help with a smile. 

There is happiness in the moment. This day, this moment. Lord, help me to keep seeing it.

Halloween 2013

It's hard to believe that the Halloween picture above is from two years ago! Someday I may replace it with a current pic, but for now my hearts content to keep it there.

Any who~ I wasn't intending to go down a sad road with this post. We decided to keep on with the tradition of having a family theme, this year: Movie Night!

We got them all dressed up and they trick or treated at the businesses downtown last week. And can I just say, I am SO glad that we did because Halloween night it was raining! The costumes were made of mostly poster board & markers that would completely ruin in the rain. All day long the kids had a solemn attitude thinking we would not be able to go. We closed up shop at 3pm and started driving home, with a van full of disappointment. If you read my last post, I'm trying (and praying for His strength) to be fully engaged with the kids, putting in a full effort.

So, I turn the van around.

A quick stop back at the shop, one quick trip to the dollar store & we came up with 8 new costume ideas that wouldn't be ruined by rain! Yay! We ended up with (in order from oldest to youngest): Spidergirl, Soldier, Football player, Princess, Ninja, Biker dude, Punk rock girl, & a blue alien (Mabel & Nicholas stayed in the van). In all the rush for plan B I forgot to snap any pictures. Boo. But the kids had a ton of fun and gathered enough candy to ensure high dental bills in our future. Success! :)

Giving up & Selfishness

Today I read this post: 

The selfish side of grief 

...and can I just say, wow!

and ugh.

I don't think all of it applies 100% to me, but I see the attitude just the same. 

She writes, "You see, when Emily died, I never wanted to want again.  I had lost my daughter and I had to go on living here on earth without her.  I felt deprived of her presence.  I felt I had lost enough.  I never wanted to feel any kind of deprivation again.  So, I started filling the void."


For me I think it boils down to distractions. Things I've used to keep myself from thinking too much, because if I think below surface level I'm sad. My distractions have come in a variety of forms: let's eat out, let's go shopping, what fun thing can we do?

....let's START A BUSINESS for goodness sake. 

In a lot of ways these distractions have been a blessing. A way for me to not completely fall apart. I love that. I see the downside to this though. I see myself not engaging as much. Not withdrawing completely, but not allowing myself to live fully out of fear. Fear that it'll hurt. I see myself not putting in a full effort like I used to. Birthdays for the kids, holidays, special events used to be SO much fun for me. I was fully invested. Now? Eh, not so much. Halloween for example we've done quite a few family themed costumes. This year (and last) I'm just not gung ho about it. My attitude has just been 'okay, I'll participate and keep the tradition' but on the inside I'm just holding back. Giving up and being selfish. 

Reading her post was like a light bulb this morning. 

I want to be fully engaged with my kids. So, I'm done.


 I'm done giving up. I'm done being selfish. Even if it hurts.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4

Time for a happy post!

 Mabel girl is walking around more and more!

 

A view of 'em all in the van. 

 

My snuggly in the morning Theo buddy. 

 

 

Nicholas is 3 months old!

 

 

and super smiley!

My soul thirsts

Sometimes I have all these thoughts that go through my head and I'm not sure any of them would make any sense if I said them out loud.

 

The thoughts are random, mostly quick and fleeting.

 

Counting out plates for a meal I go through the kids' names in my head, I pause between Abram & Noah not wanting to skip over Josiah's name but not wanting to say it aloud either.

 

Folding laundry I'll see a shirt and have this ache...he used to wear that.

 

And then I look at Noah. My lively, full of energy, adorable guy and realize that tomorrow...

 

 

 

...tomorrow he will be the exact age Josiah was the day he died.

Saturday he will 'pass' his older brother in age.

May 1st, he will turn 5...the birthday Joe never got to.

Then the tears flow.

 

 

 

and I pray. Pray for strength...for comfort.

 

He answers.

 

I open my bible to read these words:

 

O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you;
my soul thirsts for you;
my flesh faints for you,
as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.
² So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary,
beholding your power and glory.
³ Because your steadfast love is better than life,
my lips will praise you.
⁴ So I will bless you as long as I live;
in your name I will lift up my hands.

 

 

Emotional hormonal wreck

Hello, my name is Laura and today I'm a wreck.

Struggling with feeling like a failure in every part of life.

Housework falling behind.

Children who bicker.

Homeschooling, not thorough enough/consistent....not enough past the 'basics'.

Our store, will it be successful?

My health...I know I just had a baby, but I have a bunch to lose.

I feel like I have a face that everyone sees, this put together calm non-frazzled person. Ha! If only.

I stress, I yell, I cry.

I think I'm capable of quite a bit but I just seem to skim the surface of so many things without doing a great job at any of them.

So I remind myself:

“The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning, great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22,23 

Birth Story

Introducing the newest member of our family: 

Nicholas Cecil 

born February 18th, 5:38 pm

weight 7 lbs 8 oz

21 inches long

If you are anything like me than you're probably just a wee bit curious too hear how the birth went, so here goes.

     Friday & Saturday I had mild contractions kind of sporadically during the day only for them to come to a complete stop by Saturday evening. Sunday we got up went to church and went about our day pretty normally.
   
     Some time between 10-11 pm I started having contractions again, only this time they were more intense and maybe 10-15 minutes apart. By the middle of the night they'd picked up to be more around 4-5 minutes apart so we called a friend (thanks Jen!) to come sleep on the couch. We arrived at the hospital to be checked & monitored, they put me at 4+ cm but as soon as I sat they slowed way down again.

     Back home we went (this was about 9 am at this point). I tried to sleep a bit, walk a bit....still felt like things were progressing and frustrated that they sent me home. I already had a regular appointment set up at my ob's office so we headed there at noon to see if anything really was changing. My contractions are still coming around ten minutes apart. At 1:00 the doctor there checked me, saying 'you're a good 6-7 cm and 80% effaced, I think you should head back to the hospital'. She mentioned that I should go get checked in and if I'd like she could come break my water to see if that would be enough to push things really into gear.

   The doctors office is connected to the hospital so we just walked on over, this time they had a room ready for us though! Discussing all of the bazillion questions with the nurse she suggests that if I'm leaning towards having an epidural sooner may be better. If I wait until the doctor breaks my water and things speed up I may lose the window of time in which to get one. I'm torn. Part of me says NO! You can do this. The other part of me says DO IT, you're tired, this hurts and you are really tired!. Exhaustion wins out and I tell her yes, I'll take an epidural pretty please.

   In the next few minutes waiting for the anesthesiologist I'm pacing back and forth trying to move as much as possible before I'm bed ridden....and POP! my water breaks. And I mean like bursts! It was almost hysterical really.

    They hook me up with the epi and I only have a few more contractions before I'm numb and can't feel a thing. The last epidural I had numbed  me but didn't completely take away all of the pain. This one? Worked amazingly and I really could not feel a.single.thing. not even pressure. Now I'm a happy camper. What's an exhausted lady to do now that I''m numb? NAP. Yes, at this point I'm 8 cm and I fall asleep. Maybe an hour later the nurse wakes me and checks me. Complete, time to call the doc and see if we can deliver this fella.

    Literally, I wake up from a nap feeling happy...no pain or pressure and they watch the contractions on the monitor to tell me when to push. 5 or 6 pushes later I'm holding my boy.

    Aside from the frustration at the beginning of labor I'd have to say this was probably the easiest birth out of all of mine. :)

Abandoned

This blog has been neglected.

Abandoned.

Life is crazy busy (in a good way) and I've not really had it in me to write out my thoughts for...what, over a year now really? Sigh.

The next few weeks should be interesting.

Stephen will turn 10.

Mabel girl is about to have her first birthday on the same day that marks Ian & I being married for 13 years.

Three weeks from today baby boy is due to make his entrance into this world.

Most days/weeks just blur together and I'm left at the end of the month thinking, what happened to January?

I guess I'm writing all this randomness just to record that yes, I'm still here. Hopefully I'll be inspired to blog more again, I do miss it. ~